being taken advantage of financially in a relationship
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Being taken advantage of financially in a relationship mr. ipo

Being taken advantage of financially in a relationship

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Being and feeling wanted often motivates people to do better and any form of intimacy can foster these feelings. In relationships, people also tend to find the things about themselves that need to be addressed and changed to better them. No one is perfect however, some things that one needs to work on to change themselves for the better is often pointed out in relationships. If one is happy in their relationship they genuinely want to be at their best for the other person and make an effort to do better for the relationship.

There are many benefits to being in a relationship. Besides the benefits people typically think of such as having companionship or someone to provide emotional support when they are having a hard time, relationship partners can challenge each other in positive ways.

If you are Type A and your partner is Type B, they can help you learn to slow down. If you like more quiet time but your partner likes more adventure, they can help you get out of your shell. This works both ways in a healthy relationship, with each person showing a willingness to become more balanced.

There are a lot of benefits to being in a relationship. For one, if a person is going through a lot of self-destructive behaviors, a relationship can be a catalyst for a person to start getting their life together.

It is sometimes better to do something for someone else so that we can eventually get to the place where we want to do it for ourselves. All of this is true as long as we are mindful and honest with ourselves. As a person who works with many teens and young adult males, I know that they are heavily influenced by the people around them.

Especially in that age range, having a significant other that keeps you grounded is something that could be really positive. It might even cause them to spend less time with people who are not so good for them. Being in a relationship can also give us the necessary tools to learn important things like communication, commitment, and sacrifice. We are in situations consistently where we have to and that can take us out of our selfish and self-centered ways if we allow it to.

However, it is not always the case, and sometimes, if we are not careful we can fall into the trap of becoming a people pleaser or even codependent. When you are in a loving, long-term relationship, your partner usually knows you better than anyone else. If you had a horrible day at work, they can be a sounding board, offer support, and help you decompress. A great benefit of being in a relationship is having another person help you stay on track with your wellness.

If your spouse or partner sees that something is wrong, especially with regards to your mental health, they can step in and encourage you to see a professional. There are so many benefits to being in a relationship, but one of the most cathartic is becoming aware of our personal areas for growth through our relationships.

When we are single, our triggers and hot buttons are less apparent than when there is someone showing and telling us where we could grow. Having someone to support you and witness how far you have come makes it even more worthwhile. We can also be that for our partner, creating mutual advancement. In a relationship, we have a witness to our lives. This person is there for the good, bad and everything in-between, which makes the hard times less difficult.

Having someone to share your life with makes it more joyful, meaningful, and fulfilling. As humans, we have a biological need for touch, affection and to feel a part of something intimate. A relationship provides opportunities for all of these needs to be met. The main benefit of being in a relationship is the fulfillment of what EVERY single human being needs, that is a connection with another human.

Within that connection comes doing things for others what make them happy which then adds to our need to contribute to the wellbeing of others. Being able to have a partner who one can have deep conversations or no conversations with is a huge benefit for your mental health.

Having someone to cry to, be tender with and also, the intimacy that humans seek. That deep love is crucial. Being in a relationship teaches you strategies on being collaborative, how to sacrifice and how to compromise. All great skills that one needs to live in the everyday world. If you are in a good relationship, the benefits of a relationship can be more than having a plus one. If you have a relationship, you may catch yourself smiling, trying harder to do things in your life; fitness goals, work goals, personal goals, to impress your partner and because that special someone can make you feel invincible.

Dating for many people is something that people dread. The endless trying to figure out how to meet someone, if you click, going on 1st dates that seem interviews. By having support and someone to vent to you reduce the toll of which stress can take on you.

This is particularly true when your significant other can help to relieve the stress by contributing one way or another. No matter what the situation is or the issue at hand, you know that there is always going to be that one person standing by you and trying to help you the best that they can.

Knowing you have that type of support allows you to focus on the more important and precious things in life. By being in a relationship it has been proven that it can have a positive effect on your overall health. Not only does the human connection and interaction make you feel better, but you will also constantly be bouncing your moods of one another.

So, if you are a little down but your significant other is happy, they can boost you up. You can have a pile full of memories that you share from personal ones to funny moments that have happened. Re-living these memories can decrease the effects of negative feelings. This is such an important benefit, as it prevents us from slipping into a dark hole.

You feel as if you have a purpose. This reduces feelings of anxiety and anger. There are so many benefits of being in a GOOD relationship, not just a relationship. I will be bringing her to live with me this week. Her home has been the only constant in her life! Even though I have nothing, I have love, a roof and food, the same she gave me. I will take this to the limits of the law. You describe very well what many children of aging parents are experiencing — overwhelm, guilt and exhaustion.

I hope that your mom heals quickly and that you find comfort in having her live with you. You might have heard about Dr. The membership provides ongoing guidance from her and her team of professional geriatric care managers, to help you more easily get through your journey helping your aging parents. Thank you miss Nicole, I will check it out. I had no clue!! But now she is peaceful.

I will check all options, take name off her bank acct. So many memories there, I am glad she finally wants to leave. I too have a step granddaughter that is taking advantage of my husband — her grandfather. For 7 years we have fed her, provided a roof and paid all her bills. I finally put my foot down and sent her emails that this was not right. For the last year of the pandemic we have been living in hotels while the 25 year old adult granddaughter lived in our home and paid no bills, no rent money and we even gave her money for groceries.

After I said no more she had another family member threaten me with a restraining order that I am harassing her. Quite the opposite in my opinion. She manipulates him horribly and also has created a huge wedge in our relationship.

I just got word she is moving out next week because I have put out so much displeasure on how she has treated my husband and my self. Try for a year living in hotel rooms during a pandemic. Not fun at all. I wish the best for everyone who is going through this and I hope you get rid of the free-loader that maybe causing financial ruin for our elderly people we love.

COVID has turned the world upside-down for many older adults. Thanks for taking the time to share your experience and I hope things get better soon. What can I do moving forward? If you think your sibling is exploiting or otherwise abusing your mother, you should seriously consider reporting this to Adult Protective Services. Otherwise, I think you may need to consult with an attorney yourself, if you want to try to contest the change to the trust and estate documents.

I imagine contesting the change in estate documents would require going to court, but the attorney would know better than I. I am spending myself until I am completely spent to help my mother. She was willing to hand over her own life for my sake and did not get far from doing so even though I did not provide any reciprocation in return, and I will do so for my mother even if this were not so.

Other as bad and worse instances occurred in the last year and a half which I will not go on for brevity. My mother needs help; they have illegally confined my mother and my future until my mother is taken out of Auschwitz-equivalent treatment, treatment I only imagined still existed in terrorist colonies, yet may not be heard of anywhere today.

I will give everything I have to rescue my mother. I wish I could provide more specific advice, and your situation sounds heartbreaking. Your mom is lucky to have such a concerned child. Thank you. I have no money to pay a lawyer to warn the law to use its authority. We are having a similar situation where an angry estranged sibling who is taking care of elderly mother is isolating and now changing documents such as POAs.

Good luck! When my mom passed we kids had to take over the financials and all else for my dad. He just never dealt with paying bills, making health appointments, taking care of taxes, getting his prescriptions in order. They had two savings accounts.

A relief at the time, home paid for. I was the one mainly handling everything. My dads ssi is 3, a month. Some here and there to 2 of my brothers. He never had to deal with money. I never in my worst nightmares imagined my lazy ass irresponsible brothers would do this.

What to do? You might consider bringing this up with your brothers, to understand how they saw the situation and also to see if there is any way they can return the money, or at least promise to help financially support your father if it becomes necessary. Older adults often may not entirely understand the implications of the choices they make. But, we still often have to allow them to take responsibility.

If he is low on money, he may need to look into Medicaid to help pay for some needs eventually. My mother lives alone in a retirement community. Her housekeeper now can use a place to stay stories of bad luck and my Mom 82 yrs old offered to help her out until her luck turned around and let her stay in her extra bedroom.

The lady is starting her house cleaning business. This was alarming to all the kids. We had not heard of this person. We were home to visit in January and learned about this. The lady was to move in on Feb. We talked through it and talked with Mom.

We met the woman and none of the kids have a good feeling about her. We talked to mom and finally agreed to not let her stay in her house. The lady friend Jeanette let us know that no other compromise was acceptable to her. We offered to help her find an apartment and Mom was even willing to give her some money to cover the extra rent above what she could afford.

Mom wants to continue to help her out by giving her work taking her to the store and cleaning her house. I have a brother and two sisters. Jeanette is 62 and I see her not leaving any time soon. Should I talk with Jeanette in some way — I want to address her in some way. How can I lessen moms exposure and remove her from the situation — is that even possible?

Hi Mark. If the older person is living with dementia or some other condition that affects their insight and perception of the situation, there may be an avenue for family to intervene through legal or social services. If that is possible does it have a name we could ask to have at her bank. She can definitely assign an enduring power of attorney for property to her brother and he will then be authorized to manage her banking.

It might not be possible to completely remove her involvement in her money, unless she is found incapable Her brother could put some safeguards in place, and the bank can probably provide some guidance about that. Thank You for what you do.

Since this pandemic, more and more elders are being abused. Physically, mentally, and financially. In my own family, we lost my brother, a veteran. The problems started when a gal told the medical staff a lie, a tale. When the staff at the first hospital pressed the gal to provide them legal doc.

The gal, began harrassing, bothering, threatening other family members. Brother and I made our concerns clear to the medical staff, the gal got madder. The hospital transfer him to another hospital. The gal keep on her rant, lies, tales. Again he was transferred further away into Texas. The BS is still on going. We are not allowed to allow anyone into visit the patients. What a contradiction. The staff allowed her into his room without any proof of who she was. Did not ID her.

Their reasons are many. People need to speak up and speak out against this. With each passing day each of us is a day older. He died and we the family was not notified. That story is just heartbreaking and must be so difficult for your family.

Hospitals have policies about who has access to patient information and visiting rules are stricter than ever, but situations like the one you describe can still happen. I have an elderly friend who lost his savings due to a scam. I want to give him some money to make him more financially secure.

I spoke with the person who has durable power of attorney for his affairs. She suggests that I set up a savings account for him that requires two signatures his and mine before any funds can be withdrawn. Her reasoning is that should he die, the money in the account could be withdrawn by me and not be included in his estate.

I would appreciate your advice. They mention that you could set up pre-paid bill payments for them, offer them some employment, or co-sign a loan. I hope those tips are helpful and thanks for sharing your comment. I am her POA. I have been caring for all her needs, including lawn care, shopping, MD visits, etc.

This family member has a history of failing businesses and moves frequently, some 10 times in the last 5 years. I have expressed my concerns to my mother, who refuses to discuss the situation with me. Her mental capacity is sometimes altered, but not to the point she can no longer live alone. Who is the best person to speak to regarding this, an attorney, law enforcement, the MD? One of the important questions in a situation like this is whether your parent is capable of managing their property or not.

You might also be interested in Dr. The online version has resources and worksheets that can help you work through the steps of figuring out the best way to helping your mom and start to take action. You can find out more by clicking on this link. When I finally had a chance to visit with him alone I asked him how he felt about selling his home of 45 years and moving in with his girlfriend. I became concerned after witnessing his girlfriend giving away personal property of his, literally right behind his back, and witnessing her outburst at him and myself and my husband on several occasions.

I made a report to our APS office, hoping that they would be able to visit with him privately and let him know that he had a voice in what was going on. The girlfriend had taken my father-in-law to the hospital, where he stayed for a couple of days, until they released him on hospice care. Sadly we got a call about 4 hours after saying good night that my father-in-law had died. My father-in-law was found lying on the bathroom floor and the paramedics believe he had a massive heart attack and died before he hit the ground.

The girlfriend told us she had given him two Benadryl, and taken some herself to help them sleep. The girlfriend has produced a will that was very poorly written and dated less than 30 days prior to his death. That will gave his estate to his two children, named the girlfriend as executor and trustee of a very peculiar trust to be established for my husband , and named my father-in-laws brother as alternate for both. My sister-in-law has been amazingly agreeable to everything the girlfriend has stated, and the rest of the family is shocked and devastated and just not sure where to turn for help.

Since my father-in-law is now deceased, it seems the APS investigation will not move forward as APS does not involve itself and what they consider to be family matters. I am wondering if this is something we should report to local law enforcement for consideration? None of us in this family can afford the expense of attorneys to handle such a complex case that involves such a relatively small amount of money.

Any suggestions you may offer would be most appreciated. Thank you for publishing this article. It gave me some sense of peace knowing that I did the right thing by calling APS a few weeks ago. I only wish it had been in time to help and to remind my father-in-law that he had a voice even up until the very end. I pray that someone else finds this article at the right time in their life, and utilizes the help referenced. Thank you so much for letting us know that the article was helpful to you, and I do hope that others find the information to be timely and useful as well.

You mention that the house was taped off as a crime scene, so perhaps finding out if there has been any follow up investigation would be a place to start. Unfortunately, it often requires lawyers and legal expenses to sort out an issue like the one you describe.

When selling the house, though, there would have been interaction with a lawyer and banker, and I wonder if those professionals had a sense of whether your dad was being coerced or was making a decision on his own? We grew up with a very loving mom and dad, even though my dad was more strict, but my mom wore the pants.

My mom was very educated and super smart. They worked hard to be able to have a good retirement. It all started a year ago, during this pandemic. Our dad was put on in-home hospice and my mom wanted to take care of him, from their home. What we thought would be a short time, has turned into a long time for all of us. Yes, he is dying slowly, but surely. My mom decided to get hooked by a romantic love scam during these lonely nights, by someone acting to be famous and lives outside the USA.

Within the past 8mos. In the mean time about 2mos. It was like the Amazon, Microsoft, Norton scams. She was sending gift cards to that scam and we said, when do you ever pay bills with gift cards. We just knew the romantic scam would eventually hit.

Now, as of a week ago, she sat us all down and told us her famous person is coming to live with her in the deep woods of Alabama. We said why would this rich famous person want to live in the deep south, when he has a mansion on the beach in a beautiful country. She says because they are in love and he would drop everything for he. He played off the last few months that he had to go to prison, because of something he did a long time ago. His lawyer wink, wink calls and emails my mom to set up the payment.

She is refi. People ask all the time what have we done to try to wake her up. We tell he she is believing someone ear to ear, not eye to eye. He always has an excuse, then he sends her a selfie. In which I take the real famous person and send her a selfie of him and even put dates and sayings on the selfie we send and then we tell her how easy that is done.

He tells her he can see her live, once he is out of prison. We then told her we would bring the money to him, to get him out. He shot that down by telling her he is a man and does not need us sons men to get him out, but my mom can come to him. We have done anything and everything one can think of and we still can not stop it. For us, we will still talk to her, look somewhat after her and still be there for my dad. We would never guessed in a million years that my mom would fall for this such of thing.

It is truly sick! Our mom turned stupid!!! The unscrupulous scammers prey on the emotional vulnerability of single women and men in their later years. The article is timeous for me because I feel lonely even though my extremely busy daughter lives and works not far from my home 4o minutes drive.

I am divorced over 25 years. My busy daughter Covid work demands , born overseas, will be accompanying me back to the States. The American Association for Retired Persons website has quite a few articles about moving and downsizing as well. I am a senior living on a tiny pension. I have just been bullied and intimidated by a lawyer and likely will lose my house and retirement.

I cant afford a lawyer and my house is paid off. The equity in my house was the only reason he went after me. I called over 20 agencies to help me but nobody would. This abuse at its worst. Allegations were made up and I didnt have a lawyer so the judge awarded him a judgement of 1. This is a crime to take everything a person has because they cant afford a lawyer. My grandson is 22 and she is something, from Jamaica. My grandson and I used to be very close, he spending summers with us every year while he was growing up.

Now, it seems his wife thinks of us as an unending money source and is constantly haranguing us for more and more. Now she calls me and yells at me that I need to send him more money because the job took twice what he anticipated. The thing is, hers is the only phone, so I cannot reach my grandson without her.

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4 Shocking Ways Narcissists Bleed You Financially

My frustration is getting bigger and bigger week by week. I am 36 years old, have got a reasonably good job, small car, nice flat. If you're concerned about the fairness of your financial arrangement or feel he's taking advantage of you financially, have an honest discussion. This article will, therefore, give you some great tips on how to not be taken advantage of financially while dating or in an early relationship. What you'll.